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Raul scored a penalty goal against Espanyol making it 200 La Liga goals joining an elite group of players that have scored 200 and more including ex Real stars, Hugo Sanchez and Alfredo Di Stefano.

The «king of Spain» as I like to call him is the 5th highest goal scorer ever in La Liga and he needs 52 more goals to be all time leading goalscorer.

It is debatable if he would ever achieve this honour as he is 30 years of age now and he is not getting any better. Some would say he is back to his best as he is having a good season but if the truth be told he has peaked and at this point in time he is just the best that he can be not back to his very best.

He has had 3 wasted years where I feel that he would have easily been the league’s highest ever goalscorer by now if not for that period. His problems seem to start from the obsession of Real Madrid presidents had with the so called galaticos. A term used to describe football players of immense popularity and marketing ability.

This was fine with the acquisitions of Luis Figo and Zinedine Zidane as they always played the ball on the ground and depended more on skill than pace which was fine with Raul.

By the time, Ronaldo and then David Beckham were bought then Real’s style of play changed with Beckham always looking for the long accurate punts that suited the more athletic and quick Ronaldo than it did Raul. Raul found himself being part of a cog to feed Ronaldo rather than in a system that suited his style of play. It was alleged that he fell out of love with the game and his damaging knee ligaments did not help his mood either. All in all it was a bad time at Madrid with there been reports of 2 camps. Raul, Guti, Michel Salgado and others said to be in 1 and Roberto Carlos, Ronaldo, Robinho and others said to be in the other although Carlos was more friendly towards the Raul camp than Ronaldo was.

The arrival of Fabio Capello and the subsequent leaving of Ronaldo helped to alleviate the tension at Real Madrid as far as raul was concerened and he appeared to get back his appetite for the game.

It is no coincidence that this season with Raul playing where he likes and mainly just supporting Ruud Van Nistlerooy that his goal output has improved again because last season under Fabio Capello, even though his fitness improved he was played far from the opposition’s goal as it was either in midfield or in the wings.

It has been said in the past and even Guillem Ballague, sky sports’ Spanish football expert stated that Raul is a player that is not a perfect 10 in any capacity as he felt Raul could not dribble, did not possess great pace or could use his right foot.

I have heard all this before labelled against Raul that he did not excel with any particular attribute but I disagree strongly. At his best and that was before Alex Ferguson put the kibosh on his career by labelling him the best player in the world after he tore apart Manchester United; he was the most intelligent striker in the world as he seemed to have a computer for a brain.

He knew instinctively when to lob a goalkeeper or when to round him and he really should have won the European footballer of the year on countless occasions. After all if Michael Owen can be awarded such an award then so should Raul.

He may not have been blessed with blistering pace and frankly I do not understand some people’s obsession with pacy players but he was a great player when he was at his very best. He could dribble past opponents on a 1 on 1 basis as much as any striker out there and his 1st touch was better than any striker out there save for Alessandro Del Piero of Juventus.

Perhaps he could not go past 3 or 4 opponents and unlike players like Thierry Henry, he could not exploit space afforded him because of his lack of blistering pace but unlike Henry he could exploit a modicum of room afforded him as he could turn on a sixpence and make something happen out of nothing.

He is the highest ever goalscorer in the Champions’ league with 61 goals and his country’s highest goalscorer with 44 goals in 102 matches. He is widely respected in Spain and I guess by the whole football community as 1 of the greatest if not the greatest Spanish player of all time.

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Everybody wants to have a happy and successful relationship. We must remember that good relationships don’t just happen – after all, we’re not living in a fairy tale. We have to work at it.

Here are my 10 most important keys for relationship success:

1. Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!

Don’t expect your partner to read your mind. We all know that men and women use different languages – learn to speak your partner’s language. Learn to listen – God gave us two ears and one mouth. Eliminate distractions so that you can focus on one another’s conversation.

2. Resolve conflicts or disagreements respectfully

It is a myth that happy couples never disagree. You are two unique people – of course you’ll think differently about things. Learn to resolve conflicts when you are calm and can think things through rationally. And always try to maintain the other person’s dignity and self-esteem. That means no name calling!

3. Have goals for your relationship

It is always a good idea to set goals together as a couple – whether 3-month, 6-month, 1-year or 5-year goals. And don’t be intimidated by the word goal. All we’re saying is that the two of you should agree on what you want from or out of your relationship. When you do this, it helps to keep both of you united with a common vision. To give you an example, your goal this year might be to have more fun together as a couple. And how you’ll do that is to schedule two date nights every month and maybe take a fun class together, like a dance class. This is exactly what one of the couples I worked with last year did and they enjoyed it so much that they decided to go on and take their dance exams.

4. Stop keeping score

This is a biggie. A successful relationship is one where each party gives 100%, not 50-50. «I did this so you must do that» does not make for a happy time! We women are particularly good at keeping score and this can be really bad for our relationships because we give from a position of expectation instead of out of love.

5. Keep the romance alive

Get out of the habit of only taking about mundane things like if your phone account has been paid or who needs to collect the kids from ballet or soccer. Remember when you first fell in love? How you spoke for hours on end just staring at one another? Start flirting again – use SMS, email, phone, notes on pillows, etc. Have a specified date night at the very least once a month. Even if you only go to the Wimpy for a coffee, it will give you a chance to reconnect romantically.

6. Ensure that each other’s needs are met

Men and women have very different ideas of what is most important to them. I come across this in my coaching work all the time and it never ceases to amaze me. If you don’t know what your partner’s top five needs are, ask them! It will help you understand why they behave the way they do. Just to give you an idea of how needs differ, women usually rate security in their top three while men usually rate sex in their top three!

7. Decide to be happy rather than right

I know I’m going to tread on toes now BUT you need to continually ask yourself, do I want to be happy or right? Please understand that I’m not saying you should become a doormat. But sometimes you have to ask yourself this really hard question. You may win the argument but have you won in love? Learn to admit when you’re wrong and say sorry.

8. Focus on your partner’s strengths

Sometimes we forget why we fell in love. On my workshops and when I coach couples, one of the first things I make them do is write a list of things they love about their partner. I do this because when we take our eyes off the negatives, we start to appreciate our partner’s unique gifts and characteristics. When you’re focused on what a good father your husband is, it’s hard to keep remembering that he leaves the toilet seat up, or forgets to change the toilet roll.

9. Make time for fun

Notice I said «make time». You have to schedule it because if you wait until you have time to do fun things, you’ll be waiting forever! Take the time out to laugh at silly things, go see romantic comedies, leave silly notes in his lunch box, in his car or on his pillow. My husband and I regularly flirt by email. It sounds like a small thing but it really does add a lot of fun to the day.

10. Say «I love you» often

Those three little words mean such a lot. Don’t assume that he/she knows it so you don’t have to say it. Don’t worry – you won’t wear the words out! Besides saying it, think of some other ways that you can show your love. For me, nothing says I love you like a clean kitchen sink! (In fact, I was quoted in Shape magazine recently for saying that a clean kitchen spells romance for me).

The good news is that you don’t need him or her to be a willing participant to see a difference in your relationship. Of course, it is nicer if both of you decide to change your relationship for the better.

Remember, you can do it! Here’s to your awesome relationship!

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My front window gives onto the street, and every day I see people walking their dogs. Maybe a half dozen folk in all, giving their pups some exercise. But over the last week, since California went on «lock-down,» I’m utterly amazed by the number of people walking. With dogs, without dogs, with children, on their own, pushing strollers; it’s a wonder to behold, because along with the benefits of fresh air and exercise, these walkers are stimulating their immune systems.

And what, along with following the CDC and WHO guidelines, does the most to protect you from COVID-19? Strengthening your immune system, which–in a nutshell–is your body’s defense against disease. We already know that the coronavirus is deadliest among those with compromised or weakened immune systems. Maintaining/developing a strong immune system can go a long way toward our staying healthy.

That being said, you can only walk so much in one day. Gyms are closed, both my dance studios are closed, soccer games and other group sports are canceled. Working out at home to YouTube videos is great, but again, limited by how much «no pain no gain» one is willing to endure.

But here’s the good news: there are 2 things you can do right now in the privacy of your own home to significantly improve your immune system.

1. Institute The 5-minute Pity Party.

I don’t know about you, but my first response to my finding out my ballet and ballroom classes were shut down indefinitely was to call my BFF and whine. Loudly. For a good 15 minutes. Poor woman, I’m surprised we’re still BFFs. Oddly enough, when all my work canceled, I didn’t have a melt-down, because at that point I still had dance to help me keep my sanity. But once the dance classes went, that’s it, I lost it.

That’s when I knew I needed to institute the 5-minute Pity Party. The 5-minute Pity Party is when you acknowledge that you need to rant, rave, whine and generally have a FIT over whatever aspect of your life has just been nuked by the coronavirus. It doesn’t matter whether it’s your job you can’t go to, your child who now relies on you 24-7 for all education, entertainment, maintenance, etc., or your gym/church/class you can’t go to, it’s time for a release of your anguish. Fine.

Set a timer for 5 minutes. Have at it! In the safety of your shower, bathroom, parked car, wherever you have maximum privacy, let it all out. Scream if need be at the injustice of it all, wail your despair at what seems to be a hopeless situation, and cry out your woe-is-me to your heart’s content. But when that timer dings, you’re done. Pick yourself up off the floor of misery and regroup. Move on to step 2.

2. Value What You Can Today For A Better Tomorrow.

There are actually 2 parts to this step. One is how you think/feel, the other is what you do.

A. Think/Feel

Look around you. What can you appreciate about your life right here, right now? You still enjoy running water and electricity, you still have a roof over your head. Don’t let thoughts like «Yeah, but for how long?» intrude. You still have whatever health you enjoy. You still have your friends/family. You have endless access to resources via the internet. Dwell on whatever you can find to appreciate, to value and be grateful for, because that single action will have a dramatic, positive impact on your immune system.

You see, when we think/feel negativity, our immune systems suffer. And when our immune systems cease functioning optimally, our health can rapidly decline. So bolster your positive thinking as much as you can. Turn yourself into an optimist. Because optimists thrive-and so should you.

B. Do

Get creative! What’s the best possible use of the time you now have? Many are finding that with a little creativity they can continue some or all of their business using online platforms mostly from home. There are always projects we let go by the wayside for lack of time, how about picking up some of those now?

Make daily (realistic) lists of what you want to accomplish, and check off items as you get them done. You will feel productive, like you’re not just spinning your wheels, and with that, your immune system will benefit. In the long term, so will your life.

In every crisis, there is opportunity for new growth, new inspiration. Let’s keep our moments of dark despair as brief as possible and amp our times of appreciation as much as possible so that we come out of this challenging situation stronger and better than ever.

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Whether you want to believe it or not, we like to watch sports for very different reasons than you may think. In fact, the real things that cause us to like sports are in every person, whether we like sports or not. What things can we learn about human nature by simply looking at our fascination with competition? The answers may surprise you. Not only are the answers interesting in themselves, but they may just help you in other ways too.

There are some fairly straightforward and obvious explanations for why we like sports to be sure. Sports teach us about loyalty, perseverance and honor. It gives us a way to bond, it’s cathartic, and we identify with teams and players. We live vicariously through the players we watch. We have our favorite players, and there are teams we’ve grown up rooting for because our brother or dad used to love them, and now we still root for them today. Or we may follow a sport now that we used to play as a child.

But there are some deeper, more powerful and fascinating reasons too.

We’re All Just Big Children

Whether you want to believe it or not, all adults are just big children. We’re all just big kids. We just hide our true feelings and thoughts with highly developed skills (or at least most of us do). We still want to belong or be accepted by our peers, we all still want to be loved, we still feel emotional pain, and we still find ourselves giving in to immediate gratification when we know better. And yes, some of us still lie and cheat in our normal day to day lives.

We certainly hide things better and often successfully ‘act’ as if we don’t care about belonging, or love, or pain, or whatever. Deep down inside we are a little more mature and wise, but basically still just children. We may not say it out loud anymore, but we still think to ourselves sometimes, «That’s not fair!» We would rather play than work. Some may argue, depending on whether they pee standing up or sitting down, that this is especially true for men. Maybe that’s why there are more men sports fans than women.

You see, watching sports gives us a perfect, safe and secure, black and white, little microcosm of life. Following a player, team or game allows us to experience ups and downs and a whole array of emotions, just like in real life, but we aren’t actually affected.

And unlike life, sports and games are generally fair! There are rules and a crystal clear framework, or paradigm that all the participants and spectators know about. There are never any monkey wrenches thrown into a sports game, like the rules changing mid-game for instance. If rules are broken, the offender is penalized. They don’t frustratingly get away sometimes like in real life.

At the end, there is an unambiguous winner and loser. We get to pretend that the game we’re watching is life, where everything is perfectly fair, everyone plays by the rules and everything makes sense.

Children tend to think of things in much more black and white terms. It is only through living and maturing that we realize that all of life is a series of grays. But we all still long for a simpler and easier life. When things are only seen in black or white, things indeed seem simpler and easier, but life isn’t so clear-cut.

This helps explain why politicians who break their platform down into simple sound bites and into terms devoid of complexity often do better than politicians who talk about life like it really is, a complex, interrelated world of nuances.

Watching sports allows us a temporarily safe and socially acceptable way to be more like our true nature, and our true nature is frighteningly childlike. So the next time you deal with a difficult person, remember that they are just a large child, like you and everyone else, and maybe that knowledge will help you deal with them a little more easily.

What do watching a horror movie and sports have in common?

Ever wonder why so many people, including maybe you, enjoy watching horror movies so much? They provide a safe way for people to experience high levels of suspension without actually being in any real danger. Sports can be the same way. Again, watching sports allows us to enter a perfect world where the suspenseful outcome has no bearing on our real lives (unless you have a nasty sports gambling problem of course).

People love drama, suspension, and resolution, which are all elements inherent in sports. In fact, the closer the game, the more suspension there is. If we identify with a player and he wins, we are vicariously happy for the success. However, if the player’s team loses, we feel the defeat a little as well. But our lives are unaffected. And sports announcers usually only add to the drama and suspension.

A sports game is a sort of story. There is a beginning and an end. There is a protagonist (your team) and an antagonist (the other team). There is a scene and setting, the stadium at noon, and there is a plot, which is the action. Only after the games ends, and depending on if your team won or not, is it decided to be called a fairy tale ending or a tragedy.

Reptilian Brain and War

Whether you want to believe it or not, humans are a lot closer to nature and the animal world than most people like to think. We’re not just close to nature; we’re a part of it! Evolutionarily speaking, we are much closer in time to our unintelligent animal ancestors than we are to a transcended sentient species apart from nature. Our behavior is guided much more by our ‘primitive brain’ than our more recently developed neocortex, which is the seat of our intelligence. The primitive brain, or lower brain function, deals with fight or flight behavior, hunger, fear, and sex, among other things.

A common, yet erroneous concept is that the human brain is the result of billions of years of evolution. Our primitive or reptilian part of the brain is that old, but our brain’s extra large neocortex, the thing that separates us from other mammals, came about only a couple million years ago, a mere drop in the evolutionary bucket. The neocortex has not had much time to develop, and so our primitive brain plays a significant role in our lives.

Our basic flight or fight mentality is manifested in sports. We can relate, on some deeper and unconscious level, with the guy running with the football towards the end zone and being chased by a pack of angry men. We can understand what it feels like to check another player in hockey and slam him into the boards. Or we can sympathize with the NASCAR driver who gets passed by a competitor, but throws it into a higher gear and chases after him.

Our primitive desire for dominance is represented in sports. When our team wins, we experience a sort of dominance over the opposing team and their fans.

Our predatory nature is lit up when we see a linebacker following a running back through a mass of football players, waiting for the perfect moment to strike his prey with a tackle. Watching someone chase the man with the ball in basketball, soccer, or baseball affects us in similar ways.

Our tribal instincts are fulfilled by sports. We all want to belong to something; it’s a basic human need since we are such social animals. We identify with a team like our ancestors would identify with their tribe. This is especially true for the Western world’s modern man, where community has taken a back seat to independence.

Our primitive warring nature is satisfied by sports. There seems to be an innate desire for war, even in so-called ‘modern’ man. Indeed, look at the world today and how many current wars are going on, and you’ll see how far we are to real peace. Pathetically, that last statement holds true for almost any time in history, regardless of when you’re reading this. Again, this goes back to the fact that we are ruled more by our ‘primitive’, survival-driven, fight or flight brain than our reasonable and intelligent ‘modern’ brain.

Every sports game is like a tiny war between tribes, with an end and a declared victor. But there’s one important distinction; unlike war, no one has to die in sports.

One of the reasons going to a game is more exciting than watching it on TV is that there is a kind of energy created when so many people get together and root for one cause. You might even liken it to a mob mentality. We don’t have to look farther than our own stadiums where pandemonium has broken out in protest to a call or in celebration of a win. Sports strongly appeals to the gaming and struggle instincts of humans.

And since our modern lives no longer contain any real physical danger and all our basic needs are immediately taken care of, we now have a void that needs to be filled somehow, our primitive brain expects it. Sports fit the bill. It gives us the illusion of reality where there are no consequences. It gives us the illusion of battle, war, victory and defeat, without the consequences. And it gives us the illusion of being a child again, even if it’s all temporary.

You may not like sports at all, but we are all a quite childlike inside. We all yearn for some level of drama in our lives. And we are all constantly affected by our primitive brain. Watching sports is one excellent way for people to reconcile these inescapable facts.

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Many youth soccer coaches have coached multiple seasons and they feel comfortable with their knowledge about soccer and coaching. This comfort leads them to believe they know everything they need to know about coaching soccer and they become far too complacent simply «winging it» during practice.

If you are one of these coaches, you are doing your players a great disservice because the simple fact is, your players will not learn as much if you don’t plan practice beforehand. A plan will allow you to put together a list of topics you hope to teach your team and cover as much ground as possible during the season.

Your time will be utilized to the fullest if you operate in this fashion. This will greatly increase your chances of achieving soccer coaching success as defined by two factors: 1. Did your players learn and improve their game 2. Did they have enough fun to play soccer again next season. It all comes back to your practice designs.

Considering your team is made up of kids, some of whom will have very short attention spans, a fluid practice where you move seamlessly from drill to drill will decrease the chance your players will get distracted. It will also show them that you «know what you are doing,» making it more likely that they will listen and learn.

Your kids will not have fun and will not improve if you lose control of practice and you are much more likely to get to the point of madness when you are winging it. If you plan everything out before the time arrives, practice will go much smoother and the kids will learn and love the game, and you will look like a superior coach.

I also know that not everyone has the time or the ability to plan out practice, so I have put together a book with 20 original and pre-designed soccer practice plans, made up of my most effective drills. If you are short on soccer or coaching knowledge or insanely busy, these practices can be the blueprint to your entire soccer season.

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